Thursday, January 31, 2008

So Much Rattling Around

I have so much rattling around in my head right now and I need to get it out. This post may not make a whole lot of sense. I'm positive it will be quite disjointed, but better my blog post than my brain.

Let's see.

I'm thinking about buying this shirt, only with red letters for leukemia. Wondering if I can wear it to church.
I had a dream about my friend J last night. It was interesting. We were at church at our knitting group (not that J ever went to one of those, she was in the hospital). In my dream, J was there. The thing is, the rest of us knew she was dead and shouldn't be there, but no one wanted to say anything or look at her too long for fear that she'd go away. But I couldn't help but just soak up the sight of her and didn't want to look away.

On the topic of loss, my brother sent me a link last week. My reaction to it surprised me. This is a satellite photo of where I went to school (2-9th grade). This picture means nothing to anyone reading this, but it makes me misty. All of the buildings north of the football field are where I spent several years of my young life.

Here's what it looks like now. All of it. Probably not the football field.
No, there wasn't a localized natural disaster in East Texas that you didn't hear about. Apparently, "they" decided to demolish all of the buildings. I don't know where the current Elementary and Middle Schools are. I don't know why the decision was made to tear these down. Asbestos?

Anyway, it made me a little teary eyed to see these. The guy who took them took before and after pictures and has about 1,000 on flickr. There were some interior shots - lockers, bulletin boards, etc. It's not like I was ever going to return to these buildings, but I guess they just felt like part of me. Odd?

A few weeks ago we found out that Sparkle's Godmother, Elastigirl, will not be continuing her journey toward becoming a priest. At least not in this diocese. She had interviews with the powers that be in December. The purpose of the interviews was to make the decision whether to approve her to continue in the ordination process. Are you ready? "They" (there "they" are again) decided that "they" did not perceive a call to the ministry in her. Anyone and everyone who knows her is stunned by this news, because her call is crystal clear to anyone with a brain (even if it's swizzled at times). Sadly, even though a lot of us thought things had changed in our diocese, I suspect that "they" are getting "call to the ministry" confused with "penis". That's all I have to say about that.

On a lighter note, somehow a friend of mine talked me into being in a very short play at church. It's called Body Talk. I'm the bladder. Yes, the bladder. It's basically about parts of a body fighting with each other; comparing them to the Body of Christ. I think I have the least lines, but most of them are snarky. Just hope I don't pass out. I don't like getting up in front of people. Adrenaline makes me dizzy. I'm sure it'll be fine. What better place to take a risk? The main reason I'm doing it is that I don't want my girls to have that same fear. If they take after their father, they definitely will not be afraid. Right now they certainly don't have any fear. I'm just trying to do my part.

OK. Breathing more slowly now. Brain slowing down. Thanks for making it to the end of the post.


Duchess of Insanity said...

He said penis....

Duchess of Insanity said...

Seriously though....who in the he** do "they" think "they" are????

Sorry about your school. Not that this will make you feel any better, but my high school, once a lovely open air campus now looks like a prison camp. Sad but true.

You will be fabulous in the play. I can't wait to see it! Umm....when is it again?

mama.king said...

The "ear" is glad you are part of the group, especially since I get to yell at you. ;-)

Mary Beth said...

Congrats on your brave performance! I will be there supporting you from the audience!!

Mary Beth said...

Oh, I came over to say, I tagged you at my place! "Book Meme."

I love the shirt. Much more polite than my wording of that! And I love that you dreamed about J.

Anonymous said...

Maybe we should do some dream work - I had the oddest one about several members of the parish -

I miss J a lot and I wonder how I'll feel during the upcoming Icon workshop - which I am doing this time no matter what!

It's hard to see memories get re-arranged with no say in the process - especially if you ever wanted to drive the girls past teh school just so they could see.

We need to have lunch/coffee soon - thanks for the info ont he washer - I think you & I have the same one now... scary?

Anonymous said...

OH - and you're going to be great in the play - I'm looking forward to it!!