Yep, yesterday was MY turn...I was the one who lost my sh*t.
Actually, I was in control the whole time, but I'd just had enough. I yelled at GND. It, sadly, felt kinda good.
Let me give you a bit of a mental picture. Our driveway is in the front of our house. We have a sitting area inside the house that has French doors that look out onto a porch and the driveway beyond.
Twinkle, GND and a little boy, D, were playing outside yesterday afternoon. At one point, Twinkle seemed a bit upset because the other two were playing catch and she wasn't, but I knew that would pass soon enough and wasn't anything major.
About half an hour later, I heard the kids playing in the driveway and looked out through the blinds on the French doors. The nice thing about this is that I can observe without being observed. Twinkle was sitting on the porch and the other two were riding their scooters in our driveway. OK, no problem.
Then I hear Twinkle say, "Guys, can you get off my driveway. I want to be alone." I thought that sounded a bit rude, but wanted to see how things played out. The next five minutes were filled with Twinkle asking over and over that they let her have some time alone and go play in the cul-de-sac. Each time she'd say this, GND would smile at her and say something along the lines of "we want to play here" and she'd ride her scooter in circles right in front of Twinkle and sometimes around her. D, wasn't leaving, but he also wasn't taunting Twinkle. He was just riding his scooter further up the driveway away from Twinkle and GND. Twinkle's voice got louder each time she asked them to leave until she finally started crying. GND still with her little smile continued her circles, pushing me over the edge.
I think I can recall what I said word for word. I opened the door and said/yelled, "GND THAT IS ENOUGH!! She has asked you, like, 20 times to let her have some time alone and to go play in the cul-de-sac. You're just doing that to be mean to her and you're doing it to get THAT reaction (pointing at a crying Twinkle) and that is ENOUGH! Now, go play in the cul-de-sac and let her have some time alone. I've had enough of you doing that!"
I think she was a bit stunned at first, but by the time I finished she had such a hate filled look on her face. She narrowed her eyes at me and if looks could kill, I'd have been lying on the floor of the sitting area. She turned and rode her scooter out of the driveway and into the street - I think D may have left before I finished yelling. Twinkle looked at me and said, "Thank you, mommy."
I brought Twinkle in for a few minutes and gave her a hug. I explained to her that I may have just ruined her chances for playing with GND or D for the rest of the day. I also told her that she didn't need to play with GND anyway, because there's no reason for her to put up with someone treating her that way. She stayed in for a few minutes then decided to go ride her bike, whether they played with her or not. A little later I looked out and saw Twinkle and D riding up and down the street.
Mr. S, who had seen the storm coming, had taken Sparkle and the dog out into the backyard about the time the yelling started. He told me later that he'd seen Twinkle and D go over to GND's driveway and that they seemed to all be talking nicely. At one point, Twinkle saw Mr. S in the backyard and said something to him which made GND's head whip around to see who she was talking to.
Twinkle came back at one point and said that GND told her that she was never going to play with her again and that she wasn't allowed to play with her. Yeah right. I told Twinkle that she may not play with her for the rest of the day, but that GND would get over it. I also told her that if she didn't get over it, that was ok too because, again, there is no reason Twinkle should play with someone who is mean to her. D, who was behind Twinkle said, "I'm not mean to her." I told him I knew that and I appreciated it. So, Twinkle and D went off to ride scooters and bikes and ended up playing with two other kids in the cul-de-sac and GND wasn't around for the rest of the afternoon. You know what? Twinkle didn't whine or cry once the rest of the day. Hmmm.
I spent the rest of the afternoon cleaning up the living room. I figured it was a better use of my energy than terrorizing the neighborhood children. I was also waiting for a call or visit from GND's mother that I assumed was inevitable.
She did actually call to say that she needed to take GND to school this morning, and that she would still bring Twinkle home this afternoon. I, blinded by my anger as Mr. S put it, assumed that GND wasn't interested in riding with me this morning and that I'd be taking Twinkle to school. As it turns out, that was a bit of miscommunication because GND's mom came over this morning to get Twinkle and had kinda thought I hadn't understood that she'd take Twinkle this morning. I had already told Twinkle that if GND wasn't nice or wouldn't talk to her in the car this afternoon that Twinkle shouldn't get all upset about it. Just let it go. She assured me she would....
So, here we are. GND's mom acts like nothing happened. I wonder if GND mentioned it to her and if she did what version of events she told her. I'm thinking about sitting outside and reading in a lawn chair the next few times the kids are out playing. The days are so nice, after all. As I told Mr. S, GND needs to just assume that I'm close by and I've got my eye on her. I think she knows now that I'm not going to put up with much.